anissaannalise: (paris)
2007-06-27 10:41 pm

Paris Hilton Redux

So here's what we know...

1. Paris Hilton is able to read.

2. She recycled platitudes while in prison in her journal... and she's also on the NYT Bestseller's List. Think about that.

3. She has no favorite biblical passage.

4. She needs more concise explication from her handlers & PR people on the finer points of contrition and humility.

5. She has a multi-tiered business built on herself as a "Brand", conducts board meetings yet has a GED, no college background and hasn't a varied and true hold on a wide vocabulary (though she reads tons all the time... Maybe she meant magazines).

6. She & Lindsay must not be friends because she said she has no friends in rehab.

7. She says that her most undesirable characteristic is the way her voice tends to climb and octave (my word obviously, not hers) when she's nervous.

8. She has ADD & severe claustrophobia. Neither of which seem to hinder her in the tiny car she drives or on airplanes... or elevators Possibly she's heavily sedated during those activities.

9. She feels she's made her own name, separate from her family & does not take family money. I suppose she thinks that other women who have GEDs & no college credits are able to brand themselves thusly... *roll eyes* Someone should tell her to acknowledge that her family name is the thing that opened those doors for her in the first place, so that ultimately she is indeed benefitting.

I just want someone to answer one question for me... WHO IN THE SHITTING HELL IS BUYING HER MERCHANDISE?!!!

I won't even go to a Hilton hotel property because I absolutely refuse to contribute any of my hard earned money to that family. She's paid to appear at clubs, clothes & accessories are comped... so who in the world is handing over their money to this woman and more importantly, WHY?!

And for the love of god, can people cease referring to her as a "girl", sweet, bitchy, entitled or otherwise?!

P.S.
Anderson Cooper is my hero. ;)
anissaannalise: (paris)
2007-06-26 07:36 am
Entry tags:

Free At Last...

And fully clothed at that!

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That's right, she's out of lockup and free to party again! Oh wait... no... that's behind her now. She's done the self-help & devotional books. She's found god and is a changed woman.

I think she's going to need a whole new set of friends. I don't recall Lindsay, Britney, Nicole or that other girl... (what's her name Sascha?) taking any oaths and making any life altering declarations. Who knows, we could be on the cusp of hearing that charity, church and decorum are "hot". XD

What's next, the in thing being an adult and actually being responsible! WTF?!

IS A WORLD WHERE PARIS HILTON & HER FRIENDS ARE ACCOUNTABLE, RESPONSIBLE & CONTRIBUTORS A WORLD WE WANT TO LIVE IN?!!!!!!!!
anissaannalise: (paris)
2007-06-11 07:35 pm

Went To The Pen. Found God.

If it weren't so cliche it'd be truly hilarious.

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That's right, Paris reportedly has deemed her jail time as a message from God & her chance to cease acting stupid, put her partygirl lifestyle aside and become a proper woman young girls can look up to.

We'll see. ;)

And I just have to ask, do they really let people keep in colored contact lenses when taking a mug shot for jail? You'd think no, because actually knowing the real eye color of a person would be important... but they also let her keep her hair extensions, so I guess it's all good. *roll eyes*
anissaannalise: (paris)
2007-06-09 06:13 pm

When Celebutantes Lose The Will To Groom...

It is surely the result of a complete mental breakdown.

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I've never thought Paris was anything close to "HOT" but I can say she needs every bit of makeup and hair extensions she's usually swathed in. That she allowed herself out in such disrepair is evidence enough of her mentally racked state.

Geez, I can't imagine what kind of flip out she'll experience when she sees these pics after she's stable again. Really not pretty and for the love of god medicate her. That the public had to be subjected to what she really looks like underneath all the accoutrement & cosmetics is possibly the bigger crime.
anissaannalise: (paris)
2007-06-09 02:05 pm

I Just Can't Stop Looking...

All I can say is...

WOW!

Kinda' harsh.
anissaannalise: (stfu)
2007-06-08 09:09 pm

I've Been in Cali Too Long...

I don't know what the hell happens to me whenever I come to California... I watch VH1 Total Access, spend too much time in the sun, drink too much and now I'm transfixed by Parisgate 2007.

WHAT IN THE SHITTING HELL IS WRONG WITH ALL OF US?!!!


I realized that I was too long here when while watching a piece on the news called "Inside Paris' House" done by Extra, I felt sad for her. There were tons of pictures in her place of her posed in what I suppose are glam shots and a few of her with family and friends (but not many), sadder still, one of her on the beach with some guy all splayed out and it was from her music video. It didn't strike me as narcissism on an epic level it seemed way more sad and pathetic... like... oh wow, I can't even remember her name... recently dead, son died, had baby, prior to this was the biggest human disaster featured on E!

Anyway, it struck me as sad like that.

That said, I still think that any woman of 26 years needs to be more together that Paris. Isn't she the oldest one of the crowd she runs with? At least she remembers to put her underwear on before she leaves the house to party.

I think I need to go back down to the Springs. ;)
anissaannalise: (writing)
2006-01-27 06:25 pm
Entry tags:

Coming Soon: The Pimp, The Ho & The Publisher Pt 2 (aka So... Like Non-Fiction... But Not Pt 3)

Yeah... you knew I couldn't let it go.

Frey, Winfrey & Penguin.

The unholy trinity of the written word and proof that a three-way is never a good idea.

As soon as I complete the composition, I'll post it. Hopefully tonight.

;P
anissaannalise: (wrytergirl)
2006-01-14 06:59 pm

Calling All The Opinionated...

Okay, here's the deal... I am poised to "go live" & launch a website named The Wryter Report. It's a webzine about everything. Basically, it's something that I decided to do because I think a really good screed deserves a better home than LJ. That's not a slam, it's just a fact. How many people are on LJ? How many really good posts do you find on a given day? I've read some exceptional posts by friends and often feel that it's a shame the showcase is so limited.

Anyway, if you think you want to submit something, let me know. The following are the categories thus far:

OpEd (because we have so few opinions to share)
Books & Magazines (review)
Moves & Film (review)
TV & DVD (review)
Gaming (though this is currently presided over by sw_fangirl)
Music (I will be shamelessly whoring MCR)
Things We Love Right Now (products & services)
What We're Reading (currently)

I think this goes without saying, but I'll say it anyway... Any & All submissions will remain solely the intellectual property of the Author. The posting of submissions on thewryterreport.com is strictly in the interest of Author and their desire to be heard. There are no contractual obligations between any Author and the site owner (me) and work may be removed at the discretion of either party. There is no fee associated with submitting or having work shown on thewryterreport.com. There is no payment either. I've paid for the hosting & the domain and that's it.

So what are the requirements for being "wryter worthy"? Well, that all depends upon the category into which you wish to submit. OpEd? Have a point & deliver it well. It doesn't have to be funny & I don't have to agree. It only needs to be well written & spell checked. Any of the other categories? Even easier. Who or What. Why or Why Not. Again, it doesn't have to be funny & I don't have to agree. Actually, it'd be best if there were some differing opinions posted. Monoliths are damned boring.

Any questions or comments? wryteme@thewryterreport.com

;P
anissaannalise: (Default)
2006-01-12 06:22 pm
Entry tags:

The Pimp, The Ho & The Publisher (a.k.a. So... Like Non-Fiction... But Not Pt. 2)

It's like a Venezuelan snuff film that just won't end...

James Frey appeared on Larry King Live last night, ostensibly to defend the "essential truth" of his non-non-fiction memoir. I'm not quite sure why anyone is referring to it as a memoir any longer. Surely, it has to have happened to be recollected from memory to be written down as a memoir. At the very least, he has to realize that, otherwise he thinks the imaginary friends are real.

Anyway, he's more interested in the "emotional truth" being paramount with his readers. WTF?! As if traveling down Bullshit Artist Boulevard wasn't enough he merged right onto Pull It Out of Your Ass Drive when he said that because it's a memoir "it's an imperfect animal" and "shouldn't be held to the standard of a perfect non-fiction document or newspaper." I clearly missed that classification in Dewey. Hmm... Perfect Non-Fiction as opposed to say, Imperfect Non-Fiction (which is oft mistaken for Fiction by the illiterati). Again I say: WTF?!

Anywho, Larry managed to get Oprah on the telephone for her take on the recent travails of the ho. She pulled a move that would impress the inner Beltway crowd. Dicey like a seasoned politico, she maintained that she still supports Frey because "the underlying message" resonated with her and the multitudes who've had their lives changed. And here's where it becomes art. She didn't disagree when asked if the work would have been better published as fiction. In a distancing motion that would make Abramoff's friends envious, she said that she's "disappointed by the controversy... because I rely on the publishers to define the category the book falls within." Nice. Just like a pimp to disavow the ho when the ho gets busted.

Frey did confirm that he originally shopped the work as fiction. There was still no denial on his embellishment of criminal records/activity & contents of legal documents (which he had, by the way, sealed, just prior to publication). So it's not like he thought he was putting out a true-to-life tell all. And the best point of irony? Page 107 of the paperback edition reads: There is truth and that is all that matters. The truth.

No, Mr. Frey... all that matters is publication, pimp-fic and best-seller status and possibly street-cred. It's not about what happened, it's about what people would want to have happened. Sex it, hype it and cash the check as fast as you can.
anissaannalise: (wrytergirl)
2006-01-12 06:35 am
Entry tags:

On A Nasty Little Habit Everyone Has... Eating

Written yesterday...

As I read the newspaper this morning, I found an article entitled Desktop Dining, it's tagline read, "It's Unsanitary, Unhealthy, Unfriendly & We All Do It." I knew I had to read this one. Overall, it was a good read. It touched on the antisocial vulgarity of the act and also the downright vomit inducing numbers of bacteria, germs and flora keeping company on one's desk, keyboard and telephone at any given moment. If, after reading such a thing, one can bring themselves to ingest anything more than a nicely chilled Evian at the desk, they are not only one I am in awe of, they are clearly one of the most revolting and base human beings walking erect (and I mean that in the most positive way possible).

I am one of those people who does not eat anywhere near a computer or a book. It's not because I'm not as busy as everyone else either. I refrain from doing so because frankly, I am quite uncoordinated and realize that the whole event would end disastrously should I have a moment of lunacy and attempt it. I also worked in my alma's library and saw books returned in conditions too nightmarish to recount here. And my father was a computer engineer... so right there, enough said.

But I digress. During lunch I broke open my latest copy of The New Yorker. In Books, Steven Shapin wrote an article entitled Eat & Run. This was also an enjoyable read. The U.S. obesity issue, weight in general, food obsession and fat aversion were covered at length in relation to a new book, The Hungry Years: Confessions of a Food Addict by William Leith.

Mr. Shapin makes the point that eating in the company of others has been on the decline and that solitary eating has contributed to current levels of obesity. The idea being that eating with others sets some parameters and people curb their natural tendency to be openly gluttonous. In effect, because the meal itself has a defined beginning and end one will adjust their consumption to approximate those in company. Of course, it's all relative. We do live in a society where the All-You-Can-Eat buffet is prevalent. Not only is one allowed to be openly gluttonous, it's become a point of advertising.

Don't think that I am against the All-You-Can-Eat establishments. Afterall, this is the United States and if a person wants to stuff themselves to capacity, stagger out and use the parking lot to re-enact the vomitoriums of Ancient Rome, who am I to say they shouldn't. Hell, it may even be a Constitutional right. (Kennedy asked Alito about that yesterday, didn't he?) What I am against is the act of eating in public and to a slightly lesser extent, in the company of others.

This isn't me being antisocial or neurotic. Really. If you ever have occasion and you've been caught on video actually eating, view it and you may never do so again. I have yet to have suffered the indignity, but I have observed others closely for years. In this time, I have determined and maintained that the act of eating is one that should be done in private, as much as possible. Put that on the list of "What Not To Do In Public" next to flossing. Would you sit around a table with friends and family and floss. No, of course not. Then why in the world would you sit around a table and attempt eating and conversation. Only one is classified as an art. They aren't to be done in tandem and the timing never works out perfectly. Ever notice that you lose the ability to chew and swallow efficiently when asked a question while you're eating? That's a hint to the unnaturalness of the activity merge. Don't screw with your CNS any more than you have too. It takes enough of a beating when you're out walking and talking on your mobile phone.

Now, with that said, I do go out to eat. Often. I prefer the privacy of a booth to a table and dim lighting to bright. I will flat out refuse a table in the center of an establishment. Believe me, not only do I wish to limit and if possible diminish the number of people who may see me ingest, I have no desire to see others display their version of mastication. The table is relatively quiet when the food arrives as Sweetie and me are believers in "Eat or Talk". We work well together, that way.

Let me also issue an indictment on the people who eat entire meals while walking down the street. WTF is that? Please, if such an urge strikes you and you can't stave it off, consider that if you lack a perfectly maintained Yogilates physique, you may become one of those sad, faceless creatures the media always captures for stories on the ever increasing waistline in the U.S. Have you noticed how they, more often than not have some item for consumption poised in their hands? I used to think they were shot headless to "protect the innocent". Sure. Right. Not! It's because you can't obtain a waiver with any decent reliability by walking up to them and saying, "Hey, we noticed that you're obese and we're doing this story about the latest article in JAMA. You know the one... it talks about how people like you are expected to die ten years earlier than your fit counterparts and that your health issues will push the cost of healthcare to more extreme heights for the rest of us. Anyway, we were wondering if we could feature you. Whadaya' say?"

I always wonder if any of the headless obese ever recognize themselves. And can you imagine how fucked up that would be? Not only are you fat, you've been used as an example of what not to be... on a national level. That's cringeworthy.

Just a thought or three...
anissaannalise: (wrytergirl)
2006-01-11 07:15 am
Entry tags:

So... Like Non-Fiction... But Not

That would be the sound of a bitch slap you hear and it's being issued by thesmokinggun.com on James Frey (author of the much-pimped-by-Oprah book A Million Little Pieces) the investigative website outed Frey on various integral "facts" being in fact, fictitious in his best-selling memoir.

The author has denied an egregious level of embellishment in his work. He has admitted to taking a sort of dramatic license if you will, for his non-fiction work. Which makes it what exactly? Non-fictionesque? Non-fiction with a lean toward fiction? Half non-fic with a double shot of fic? WTF?!

How is this any different from Vanilla Ice working the hard edge, from the streets angle back in the day? Frey embellished his criminal record and his involvement in a tragic accident cited in the book. The mother of one of the victims of the accident makes his actual proximity to the event quaternary at best, nothing close to his alleged central role. So was he going for street cred? Props?

I don't know and truthfully, can't care. I am suspicious of any book Oprah's Book Club is proffering at any given moment anyway. Also, I am not the biggest fan of the "everyman memoir": My life was hard, but I pulled myself up and beat that bitch down & that makes me a hero. Let me be your hero! I am here to inspire!

The saddest thing may actually be that his real life wasn't interesting enough to be published, let alone become a best-seller. Which may say more about society in general than Frey. No one wants to hear about a life that's just kind of bad. It has to be extreme. It's the only way to make the public interested. It gives the opportunity to sit back and feel better about oneself. If the proximity is too close, it only serves to alienate and then... no best-seller. People love the idea that someone else has divulged all their basest secrets and it's simply intoxicating that they didn't have to share their own in return. The ability to join in the orgiastic frenzy of gossip is a payoff all it's own. It's all just so sordid.

So, let me pass out the WTF?! awards for this one:

To Mr. Frey: Because a fundamental responsibility of being a writer is to know the difference between fiction and non-fiction.

To the public that made it a best-seller: You'd do well to ask yourselves if you were really looking to be inspired by a story of redemption ot you just wanted to have a peek at what may have been a human being's lowest point. I think the amount of current reality programming answers this one.

One final note, Mr. Frey's next book to be released is a novel. Which if the past is any indicator, will be fiction... but not.
anissaannalise: (wrytergirl)
2006-01-06 07:14 am
Entry tags:

Serving Melodrama With A Side of Give Me A Fucking Break!

Let me just start off by saying that I do think it's sad that 12 of the 13 miners in West Virginia perished before they could be rescued. And I'm willing to admit it's a tragedy. For their families. For their community. And possibly even for the state of West Virginia.

I was watching ABC World News last night & there was Lizzie Vargas doing her anchor desk thing. This makes me weep for the resurrection of Peter Jennings anyway, but that's only my minor point. Lizzie says that later in the evening there will be a special airing on ABC about the mining accident but she termed it "An American Tragedy" (which she'd done earlier in the broadcast) & then the logo for the show is up & there it is again. WTF?!

First of all, it was 12 people. Who did a highly dangerous job. Maybe they didn't get hazard pay, but they should have. Second, in the annals of history the following may legitimately be listed as "tragic" for the U.S.:

Pearl Harbor, September 11 & maybe even Hurricane Katrina.

Note massive death & destruction experienced in each case. These were events so over-arcing that not only did they capture the attention of those in the United States but also those around the world.

This brings me to my next point. I have deep disdain for the usage of "American Tragedy" because it furthers our completely egoist outlook on the world. We are the United States of America. Only. Surely Canada is still part of North America. And last I checked, Latin & South Americas still exist. Surely they do not feel this experience was a tragedy. It's just one more example of our assumption that the damned world revolves around us and everyone else can just go to hell.

And here's the last thing, a day or two before the WV mining story, there was a very similar happening in China. More than 13 people were trapped and they were working tirelessly to figure out how to get to them. Ironic how that story dispersed into the cosmic ether when the WV story broke. But maybe it's just me.
anissaannalise: (Default)
2005-12-31 11:08 am
Entry tags:

TAG's Best of Entertainment 2005

So here it is... the close of 2005. And just like every other person with a blog I feel you're all entitled to my opinion on what I've determined were the "Best Of 2005". Let's begin...

Top Ass Shakin '&/or Head Thrashin' Songs (the kind that you can barely contain yourself while in the car or on public transport listening to your iPod)

#1 Dance, Dance by Fall Out Boy (I honestly almost go into a full seizure on this one. One of these days after a particularly trying bout of twitch suppression while riding the Metro, I'll be taken down by the Feds.)
# 2 Helena by MCR (the urge to sing as hard as Gerard & thrash about is just too much. I'm sure people in the cars next to me have been frightened... especially when hubby's driving and I can go almost rave.)
# 3 Holla' Back Girl by Gwen Stefani
# 4 Dirty Little Secret by The All American Rejects
# 5 Shake It Off by Mariah Carey

Top Television Shows (In no particular order... because frankly, they are so different from one another that appreciation for what they are makes each stand alone)

The Shield (FX): Police drama after shooting PCP & chasing with a succession of Stoplights. It's so good it's exhausting. Excellent music also. I don't think I could handle a 22 episode season.

Nip/Tuck (FX): Plastic surgeons with so much angst, drama & cross-breeding that I now understand why Dr. Troy was snorting blow off his, now fiancee's ass, in the pilot. Off the damned chain!

Lost (ABC): I know everyone's all slushy over Desperate Housewives (I may be the last person in North America who's not watched at least 1 episode) and it just kills me that Lost is relegated to being the girl who only got the hook up at the end of the night because the only guys left are so stoned, drunk &/or stupid, that all they really want is an orifice or place-holder and not only missed that she was the smarter chick, but thought they were doing her a great favor for bestowing any attention at all. I still love it and they killed my favorite character in Season 1. As much as I tried to keep up my campaign of complaining... I had to let it go. It's just that awesome.

BSG (Battlestar Galactica) (Sci-Fi Channel): I'm a sci-fi junkie but with this one, it's about the human drama more than the Cylon situation. That's a tough order too, because the Cylon thing is wierd-freaky-kinky. They look like people, with the exception of the spinal column that glows red when having sex. They're able to reproduce non-assembly line or Ministry of Hatcheries & Conditioning. And did I mention, reproduce with humans? WTF?! And wonder of wonders, they're conveyed as somewhat sympathetic... especially with some of the crap that goes down between the humans. And yes, the soundtrack effing rocks!

The 4400 (USA): After the last season finale, all the fans had a severe jaw-drop over the whole Isabel thing. It's just one more thing to add to the list of things to obsess over and hope we'll get an answer too next season. Isn't it enough that there are 4400 returnees who have a story? Another exhausting show... but in such a good way!

24 (Fox): Each episode is 1 hour of the day and you actually have to pay attention or you'll miss something crucial... then you're screwed. The editing is top-notch and the writing is epic. Excellent soundtrack!

Top Movies/Films (just a list in order, no editorial)

#6 The Island (Michael Bay)
#5 Episode III- Revenge of the Sith (George Lucas)
# 4 Capote (Bennett Miller)
#3 Munich (Stephen Spielberg)
#2 Lord of War (Andrew Niccol)
#1 Syriana (Stephen Gaghan)

Still to see for 2005...

The New World (Terrence Malick)
Brokeback Mountain (Ang Lee)
King Kong (Peter Jackson)

And that's it, not the worst by any means, but as always, could have been better.

So Long & Goodnight 2005!
anissaannalise: (Default)
2005-12-31 05:14 am
Entry tags:

New Year's Eve Gerard Porn...

This is officially the first lesson @ The Temple. As we reflect on the past & look forward to the new, I thought it was important to make a gratuitous correlation...

That was then...

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This is now...

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To the gash that annilhilated his heart (surely a shot at close range to the head with a sawed-off would have been more merciful) and was the impetus of I'm Not Okay (I Promise).... life's a real fuck in the ear isn't it?!

But would we really have the Gerard we have now without her? Possibly not. Surely there would be no song... so in the spirit of fairness, forgiveness and temperance, I think a moment of thanks is due She Who Shall Forever Remain Nameless... for without your cold, dead, shallow heart, our world might be a little less black & red.

Here's the lesson ladies... weight can be lost later, but truly unique personalities are rarely cultivated after highschool. Just think, perfect bone structure was there all along and residing in wait. What a glorious unveiling.

Go with Gerard. ;P

Twenty-eight years on the planet, addiction, detox/rehab, therapy... and he looks this good? WTF??!!! Heaven help me... HE'S A BLOODY FUCKING ROCK GOD!

(yes, I have been awake for about 24 hours and clearly it's taken it's toll... so what of it?)
anissaannalise: (Default)
2005-12-30 06:47 am
Entry tags:

The Temple Archive Girl Worships In A New Way...

Well there's no reason why I can't just say it. Henceforth, every day is Gerard Way Day. Recognition will be in the form of genuflecting at the alter and vowing utter and unconditional devotion. I worship at the temple and so... the Gerard porn for the day is....

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All I need now is a latte. Please feel free to share a pic of your crushly devotion .